Wednesday 30 December 2009

Deadly Pen

Whilst I was at the supermarket stocking up on ready meals, I went to their stationary section to get some pads of paper, and also ended up getting a Sainsbury's own brand "premium" fountain pen for £1.99 (on special offer).

Now, pens are dangerous things, so as you'd expect there was a health warning on the box. What do you think it said?

After all, pens have a pointed bit on the end, and you could poke yourself or someone else in a sensitive place:
Don't try this at home!

And they say that the pen is mighter than the sword. And swords are a health and safety nightmare.
"Woops! Sorry Mate, I just slipped."

In the wrong hands, a pen can be used to sign someone's death warrant. Or start a war.
Mary Queen of Scott's Death Warrant

However, the sole warning on this packet was something that had never occurred to me:
At least now I know what not to do.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

They may as well tell you not to dip it in arsenic before writing. Who the hell are those warnings for? The same stupid bastards who need their peanuts labelled "may contain nuts?" Bah etc.

Jean Knee said...

bwwa haaah

idiots

it didn't say not to stick it in your eye. I think I'll do that and then sue them. One working eye is enough, right?

Bee said...

Hmmmm that would be a huge problem for me because I have a nervous habit of putting as many as 12 pens in my mouth at one time.

Bee said...

Happy New Year!