Wednesday, 29 October 2008

Wordy Wednesday

Flat Out

Chris' hilarious post about presidents and death got me thinking about road rollers, as I've always found the thought of someone getting flattened by one amusing, since they move so slowly.

Unfortunately, when I actually read a real account of such a mishap, I started thinking about how horrible, painful and slow a death it must be for that one in a million person. Which rather spoiled my fun.

Having said that, the real person didn't get run over by one whilst crossing the road, which was the scenario I had in mind. Anyway, moving swiftly on (unlike the road roller)...


Environmentally Hostile

I went shopping after work. Because the clocks had gone back at the weekend, this was my first trip in the dark for a while, so I had forgotten what a pain it is to unload the car in a dark garage (it's got no lights), with no light in the boot (my car is a basic model). Next time I go out, I'll probably find that I missed something, which by then will have started to rot.

I've not been doing briliiantly with the green shopping bags, either. The last time I forgot to put them in the car. This time I put them in the boot, but forgot to take them into the shop. Maybe next time...


In fact, although I didn't actually get hit by a road roller, the shopping trip really didn't go that well. When I emerged with my trolley-load of ready meals and soft drinks, I couldn't find my car. I usually park it in roughly the same area of the car park, and I had a vague feeling that I'd done something different, and ended up wandering round in the dark like an idiot (my basic model car doesn't have radio-controlled locking).

Eventually I realised what I'd done differently. I'd parked it in almost exactly the same place as usual, same row, about the same place in the row, but on the right instead of the left side. I'm easily fooled.

I think it's just because I'm tired, but it's going to be one of those evenings. After writing this I think I'll take it easy and try not to strain anything...

25 comments:

BEE said...

FIRST!!

Bee said...

IT'S ABOUT TIME BRIAN!

I kept coming over here (my internet happens to be up right now but it might go at any minute)(I also can't sign in because the terrorists will know all my secrets so this is why I've been commenting on blogs with my name and blog address)(I know, who cares.) waiting to be first and here I was first AND second!

Bee said...

I'd forgotten you alrready changed the time. We do it this weekend. I'm looking forward to trying to trick my body into getting up at 6 and thinking it's 7 already. It never works but I'm sure it'll work this time around.

Does your car have one of those antenna thingies?? You should put a glow in the dark ball on it.

Brian o vretanos said...

Bee:

Yes, there's only 5 hours between us at the moment, which is why you think my post is late...

Yes, my car does have an aerial, but a ball would be SO tacky - it'd ruin my street cred ;-)

Bee said...

One more day until Ubuntu!

Bee said...

Maybe you can find one in the shape of a penguin.

Brian o vretanos said...

Yes, I'm sure a flourescent penguin would be far less tacky...

Bee said...

You never know, it might be a chick magnet.

for a different kind of girl said...

Why do you all change your time a full week before we do? And when you explain it to me, can you use some more of those fancy English words, because, seriously, I love it! I now have to go put my green bags (which are actually tan) in my car's boot so I don't forget them when I go shopping later.

Brian o vretanos said...

FADKOG:

I'm not sure which Fancy English words you mean, but here goes:

We used to be the same as the US, but then the Eurocrats got involved, and decided that all European countries should change their clocks at exactly the same time - we put ours back at 2am, whereas in Greece they go back at 4am (since they're two hours ahead of us).

I remember the first year it happened (in the mid-90s) the time on all the computers was wrong for a week or two since they were programmed to observe the old rule.

Personally, I think the whole thing should be scrapped, and we should just stay on GMT all year round. It is after all one of the lasting symbols of Britain's former greatness that the whole world measures time relative to us...

Have fun on your shopping expedition.

Jean Knee said...

one time I left an entire raw chicken in my trunk. it's always warm here---you get what I'm sayin?

Jean Knee said...

Oh and ELEVENTH!!!!

Brian o vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

Not nice...

If you did that here at the moment, you'd have a frozen chicken.

catscratch said...

GAhhh!!! I lost my car in the garage in the airport in Atlanta once. Big mistake.

There are actually two garages and I went to the wrong one. Two hours later, I was finally on my way....

Brian o vretanos said...

Catscratch:

That's exactly the sort of thing I'd do - I must remember never to go to Atlanta...

Tracy said...

Does a video of this running over exist? Not that I want to watch it, mind you, but now I feel like I must because I want to know what was so awful. Plus, I think there's something wrong with my brain with it comes to morbid things like that.
I'm having the same problem as you with the bags. Mine are cloth and they were 89 cents a piece and the hubs said "You'll always forget them in the car! You'll never use them." That sounded like a challenge to me.
So, I always made sure that the bags were in the car but then I would forget to take them into the store. So I wrote myself a note that I taped to the dashboard reminding me to grab the bags. Well, I kept forgetting to read the note.
He's made so much fun of me that now I've resorted to pushing the trolley (That's what I'm going to call the cart from now on) filled with my plastic bagged groceries to the car, then spend ten minutes rebagging them in my cloth bags, then I take the plastic bags back into the store and stuff them into the recycle bin, and drive home and the hubs is none the wiser.
It's all a lot of exhausting work.

Brian o vretanos said...

Tracy:

There was no video. It was in some kind of Health and Safety report, and it just said that the road roller driver was on his break, so his mate had taken over. He went to climb back on, but slipped and fell, and the vehicle reversed over him.

I'm sure that being slowly flattened to death must be ghastly, depending on whether you go under the thing head first.

Luckily I've got no-one to ridicule me, which saves me doing the rebagging step. I also haven't got a note on the dashboard, not only would I forget to read it, I'll never remember to write it and stick it on in the first place ;-)

Dan said...

I've always said that anyone who gets hit by a train while walking is really stupid.

Chris Wood said...

Cheers Brian!

Sorry not to have posted before, but I was away.

Also just seen the Bond movie - great stuff!

Yes, the dark here stinks. It's grim and cold in my neck of the woods, here in sunny Manchester. Bah!

Brian o vretanos said...

Dan:

I agree.

Chris:

It's good to know that all that money they spent on the Bond film wasn't wasted.

They really should provide free umbrellas to Mancunians ;-)

Jean Knee said...

HAPPY HALLOWEEN,BRIAN!

Brian o vretanos said...

Thankyou, Jean Knee. I had a very quiet time, and nothing scary happened.

Anndi said...

My Chicklet used an envirobag for trick or treating last night.

I've always wanted to drive one of those rollers over something.

Brian o vretanos said...

Anndi:

I hope the trick or treating went okay. What started me thinking about road rollers was when I got my provisional driving license at 17 and found that it allowed me to drive certain classes of road roller without another driver present. I never availed myself of this opportunity...

catsscratch said...

You can go to Atlanta... just don't make note where ya parked!