Saturday 22 November 2008

In Space, No-One Can Hear You Scream...

We really do just about live in the Space-Age. Human beings are no longer restricted to living on this planet. At any one time, there are always at least two people on the International Space Centre. Okay, it's not that far away, but it does apparently count.


You'd think that going out there for a six month tour would be a great opportunity to get away from everything that might be bugging you - family, friends, the daily commute, not to mention those other evils that plague humanity, such as telesales (even Bangalore doesn't have direct dial to space yet) and spiders.

After all, there's no way a spider would get into space, right? And no-one would be stupid enough to take some with them, and then lose one? It seems that NASA have done exactly that. Oops.

Is there no escape from the evil buggers? I can't help feeling that they are really in control, and that they somehow duped people into taking them on board by pretending to weave psychadelic webs in zero gravity. The reason that we, or at least some of us, are so terrified of them is that somewhere hidden in us all is one of those race memories. Remembering a time when they ruled the world.

Maybe they're now trying to conquer the Universe...

14 comments:

Anndi said...

Oh So FIRST!!!

Anndi said...

I hate spiders. They are evil and they must be destroyed... They have creepy elbows and beady eyes and super stealth. And I hear they can bore a hole into your brain and lay their eggs.

Brian o vretanos said...

Anndi:

I'm glad I'm not the only one! I'm saving the video on your blog until later when there isn't a child in the room ;-)

Anonymous said...

Have you seen the movie "8 legged freaks" you would enjoy it.

Anndi said...

Wise move ;)

Brian o vretanos said...

Dan:

I've not watched it - I bought it on DVD recently, but Helena and I did watch "Arachnophobia" a couple of weeks ago.

Anonymous said...

Brian, you should be delighted! I followed that link, and you know what it means? Two less spiders in the world! That means it a lot less likely a giant spider will eat you.

I think.

Anonymous said...

Unless they come back from space mutated and ravenous for Brians, of course. Then it would be a real pisser.

Brian o vretanos said...

Chris:

Exporting them all to space is an intriguing idea. Really, though, we'd want to fire them into the Sun. Two fewer is certainly a good thing, but I fear that they will soon be replaced.

I hadn't thought of mutation - Now you really have given me something to worry about.

Jean Knee said...

it's part of the animal conspiracy (google it)
usually it's squirrels

Anonymous said...

Spiders are not my friend. No, sir, not my friend at all.

Bee said...

Ha ha! Mutated spiders looking for Brians hilarious!!

I think I accidentally killed the one that was in my terrarium. :o(
Right now there is a complex web system in there with little tiny dead bugs on them. I don't have the heart to break the web apart. Henry has until Wednesday to eat them up!

Brian o vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

I googled it... There are some serious nutters in cyberspace (not you, obviously).

Catscratch:

:)

Bee The Spider Lover:

Thankyou for your sympathy and understanding.

It'll be interesting to see whether you now get overrun with bugs. If you do, then I might change my position on the spirder issue ;-)

Jean Knee said...

the animal conspiracy is real Brian.
don't laugh or they'll hear you