Wednesday 1 July 2009

Wordy Wednesday: Overheating

I hope you all appreciate the sacrifies I make to bring you this blog. Don't worry, I don't mean sacrifices in the ritual sense - no virgins were harmed in the making of this post. At least, not that I know of.

However, the working conditions are somewhat less than ideal. In particular, the temperature is rather oppressive. We've had a hot week, but today is vary warm. No snowbathing photos today.


Working temperatures are goverened in this country by some ancient factory law, which gives a minimum temperature that workers are allowed to endure. If it gets any colder they can go home. It doesn't, however, give any maximum. After all, this is Britain, where things are cold and grim.

I've taken legal advice, and I've been told that I can't get out of doing my Wordy Wednesday just because there's a heatwave. Not unless I die or am hospitalised. Which wasn't what I wanted to hear. What's the point of paying your legal team huge salaries if they don't give you the right answer?

According to the thermometer in my lounge, it's around 30 Celsius. Translated for my American readers, that's "Too Hot". Especially at 7pm. I'm working up a sweat just typing.

In retrospect, it probably wasn't a good idea to open the windows, as I just ended up letting more hot air in. I did consider sitting in a bath of cold water with my laptop, but I'd probably drop it in and fry myself.


The last time we had a hot summer I tried having a cold bath. The main problem is that you can't spend your whole life in the bathtub, and when you get out you feel even hotter. It also reminded me of something I read years ago, about a couple on their wedding night.

The man worked in a mortuary, and he informed his bride that he could only enjoy sex with women who were dead, or pretended to be. I dread to think how he found this out in the first place. Anyway, he told her she had to lie in a bath of cold water for 20 minutes and then go to bed and play dead. Needless to say, she spent the night at her mother's.

With that chilling thought, I'm off to get a cold drink.

13 comments:

Jean Knee said...

FIRST!!!!

Jean Knee said...

My god Brian, don't you have air conditioning?
being hot sucks. try wetting (slightly) a wash cloth and then put it in the freezer. When frozen, drape it around your neck. and sit around naked if your window is closed, don't want to give anyone a free show.

Brian o vretanos said...

No, we don't have air conditioning. This is Britain, where it's cold and wet. I might try the cloth thing, though. I don't think that they can see into my flat that well from the police station opposite.

Jean Knee said...

I think I've found your over heating problem: looking at hawt chicks in bikinis. maybe you should change that picture.


wash cloth thing works

Brian o vretanos said...

The main problem is that I'm unfit and overweight, though I've always sweated a lot, even as a child.

The cloth is in the freezer.

Jean Knee said...

I still think it's the hawt chick

Bee said...

That is 86 degrees for us. That's what our summers should be right now instead it's 60. Maybe we're switching weather patterns?

Bee said...

I can tolerate up to 90s without having the AC on during the day but at night I wouldn't be able to sleep. Hopefully you're asleep now and not tossing and turning.

Jean Knee said...

you weinies it's been 104 here lately.

but it is true we have air conditioners so we can sleep at night

Brian o vretanos said...

Bee:

I hope we're not switching weather patterns. I don't mind getting some of your warm weather, but we can do without all the other stuff. So can you, admittedly. Perhaps you can swap weather with Jean Knee?

I did manage to get to sleep okay - probably because I was so tired after several other sleepless nights.

Dan said...

No A/C how about a fan? You got those acroos the ocean?

Bee said...

Happy Independence Day, Brian!!

neener neener!

Brian o vretanos said...

Dan,

Yes there are such things as fans. That's a good idea - perhaps I'll get one if the heatwave holds up. Of course at times like this, the shops often sell out of them...