24th March 2108

As you all know I notched up my first hundred years of blogging last October. I threatened then to do restrospectives from time to time (You know - "On this day 100 years ago"), especially when I get low on material.

However, today I'm going to give you the post I didn't write on 24th March 2008. I didn't write it because I didn't know at the time what was happening.

Looking back on that day, I see that it was nothing special. I'd posted a "Scary Jean Knee Special" a few days previously, and Jean Knee was talking about her concerns about a zombie invasion.

If I'd paid attention to her, I would have taken defensive measures. I would have gone out and got protective clothing, of the sort that can't be bitten through, and I would not have eaten that egg.

Ironically, I had been reading Jean Knee's post about chocolate eggs, and had commented that they were too sickly. Nevertheless, in the interests of science, I decided to try a few, so I'd gone out and bought some - they were being sold off cheap after Easter.

Little did any of us know at the time that a particular batch of eggs had been made with milk tainted with bacteria. It's not surprising that no-one knew, since it was not detectable by any of the routine tests carried out on foodstuffs.

I only realised about a week later when someone commented that I was walking like a chicken, whilst I was on my way to the butchers to buy some tripe. By then the first medically verified cases of zombification started to be reported.

As one of the pioneering "New Zombies", life was difficult. Of course I didn't go to the doctor - I would have been "cured" (i.e. killed), since in those days they didn't have zombie food, so we had to rely on biting people.

I kept blogging as if nothing had happened. I didn't dare talk about it. It was agony to hear about Jean Knee's fate. She'd predicted that she only had a 33% chance in a Zombie attack, and she was right. I knew it was my kind who did that to her. I'm glad that she didn't blame me personally for it, and that the 33% of her that was left has still managed to produce such entertaining blog posts and comments this past century.

[License]

Bee had managed to avoid the invasion, since she was out buying shoes at the time. Though if anyone could have outrun a Zombie in stilettos it would have been her. Tracy was also unaffected (they didn't get round to invading West Virginia for some reason).

As we look forward to this year's possible election of the first Zombie President of the United States (medical evidence has recently been found to prove that despite what many people believe this wasn't Ronald Reagan), it's amazing how far equal rights have come in such a short space of time.

I might write more on the subject another day, but right now I'm going to grab my shroud and go out for a shuffle...