Friday, 14 March 2008

Health Corner

In view of the fact that Bee is sick, I decided to postpone the "surprise balloon" post and the Vertigo tribute and instead offer some health advice on how to beat Chiropteronic Influenza, commonly known as "Bat Flu".


So here are my top tips:

Drink Plenty - All the experts are agreed that a large intake of fluids is a good thing.

Lemon Remedies - These soothe and are a good source of citric acid and vitamins.

Rest - Try and do as little as possible.

Warmth - Again, experts are unanimous on the need for extra warmth.


All of which can be summarised as follows:

Drink a large amount of cocktails, each with slices of lemon (a twist of lime won't hurt either), hold the ice, add some fire, and get someone else to make them for you.

Something like this, perhaps:



The great thing is that whether it works or not, after you've had a few you'll be beyond caring.

Oh, and try to avoid too much excitement. This may mean restricting blog reading to the more serious ones - such as this one.

20 comments:

Tracy said...

F.I.R.S.T.!!!!!!!!!!!

Tracy said...

I love your advice. The way you just sum it all up is wonderful. And you're right, even if it doesn't work, after a couple, you won't care anymore.

Bee said...

Well, I agree on all thos Dr. Brian. I just have a question, is there a vaccine to prevent this from happening again?
I made it to wokr but will probably be going home early since I feel like dog poop.

Jean Knee said...

spread as many germs around as you can before you leave, hopefully when you return the bats will be home sick

Dan said...

Lick all the bats phones.

Dan said...

Pee on their keyboards !!!

Brian o Vretanos said...

Tracy:

Well done with the first thing!

Bee:

We're already doing well to have evolved to the stage where these things don't kill us - look at tribes that have been wiped out by western viruses. A vaccine is probably too much to hope for.

Jean Knee:

You're so thoughtful.

Dan:

Licking the phones is a seriously bad idea - Bee would get more germs than she spread.

Urine is apparently sterile, so that won't work - though it will bugger up their keyboards.

Jean Knee said...

yes, you can even drink urine in a pinch and no harm will come to you. But , this is what I always wonder. If urine is so sterile why does it smell bad when confined ex: in a diaper etc

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

A lot of sterilising fluids are unpleasant, aren't they? I mean, you wouldn't want to drink them...

Brian o Vretanos said...

What I really want to know, is how it gets sterile in the first place...

Jean Knee said...

interesting thing to ponder.....

Dan said...

ok then, make stinky on their keyboards.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Dan,

I think that the main key here is "subtlety". That way Bee doesn't end up in jail, which would be bad, unless they let her blog of course.

Bee said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwww you guys are GRUHOSS!

Bee said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwww you guys are GRUHOSS!

Bee said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwww you guys are GRUHOSS!

Bee said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwww you guys are GRUHOSS!

Bee said...

Ewwwwwwwwwwww you guys are GRUHOSS!

Brian o Vretanos said...

Dan started it...

Jean Knee said...

I feel dizzy