Monday, 3 December 2007

Tis The Season...


Artists' Impression of a Snowscape

Warning - This Post Contains Spoilers


On the TV the other day, they showed the Christmas lights being turned on somewhere (Larnaca, I think), and they were interviewing children about what they wanted from Santa. One little boy thought for a while and said "Snow". (It did once snow in Larnaca - February 1985)

When Helena was here at the weekend the subject of Father Christmas came up. "He doesn't exist", she said.

I remembered back to the first Christmas where she was able to understand what was going on. It was a serious moral dilemma. I hated the idea of lying to my own daughter, and yet what would be the consequences of not supporting the Father Christmas story?

For her, I was sure that it didn't matter - After all, the main important things are the presents, the decorations, food, and so on (not being religious). But what about everyone else? By being the one person to break the parental Father Christmas Consipiracy would I face an angry mob of her classmates' parents?

So after some discussion with other parents I knew, I went along with the mass deception.

When Helena was about three we saw a Santa in the supermarket. When asked what she was hoping for she replied "An orange teddy bear". Thankfully, she's not got that much more acquisitive - this year she wants the latest Aled Jones CD. (well someone has to buy it, keep the poor guy from starving).

When whe was four she wanted a miniature Father Christmas. Her reasoning was that because he is magic, with her own FC she could do anything she wanted. I couldn't help feeling proud of her.

But now the "magic" is all over, and I can tell her the truth. Father Christmas as we know him was invented by Coca Cola to sell their evil but addictive caffeine-laced drink. Personally, I think that's a far more educational and entertaining story - after all, it has a villain, which is sadly lacking in the normal tale.

I hope you like my artwork. I know, it's derivative and has been done before, which I suppose will reduce the value. Still, if you'd like to place a bid for the original, feel free to do so.

My Christmas Wish? I'm hoping it doesn't snow. Bah, Humbug!

24 comments:

Bee said...

Brian, if you have at any point in time called me evil... well, now I know you're capable of the same ugly behavior!!!

I refreshed the page 7 times before I realized what your "painting" was!

I'm gonna get coffee, I'll be back.

Jean Knee said...

I suspected you were a godless heathen, and now I know for sure.

Jean Knee said...

did you put that caffeine reference in there to rattle me? cuz, I'm over that evil addiction

Bee said...

Being a JW for the early part of my life I never believed in SC or, FC as you call him, now we have Natalia so it'll be interesting to see how my sis handles that in a few years.
She wants a Doll House which I bought back in October. She's already picked the spot where she's going to put it.

Chris said...

Alex is now at the point of knowing that Santa isn't real...but still wanting him to be. I haven't actually told him that he doesn't exist.

At this point I'm stalling by saying 'Well, what do you want to believe? Do you want to believe in him? Because that's all that really matters!'

I just want one last Christmas before he 'grows up.' We weren't able to believe in Santa growing up and I was always kind of jealous of that 'magic' element growing up :-)

BTW - I refreshed twice before I read the caption UNDER the painting. LOL.

Happy Monday!

Brian o Vretanos said...

Bee:

That first comment of yours made my day! Thankyou! 7 times! I didn't actually anticipate people assuming it wasn't loaded.

Evil: I've got a great role model...

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

I may be a godless heathen, but I wouldn't dream of trying to rattle you ... that subtly.

No, It's just because when I was reading about caffeine yesterday I was drinking Coke at the time, so looked up how much was in a 2litre bottle (answer about 2 espressos worth).

Brian o Vretanos said...

Chris:

I'm pleased my "picture" had such good results. I might do that again, once you've had time to forget. Since you and Bee are both coffee drinkers, and coffee impairs short-term memory, tomorrow might be the best time to try ;-) Except I'm on caffeine as well, so I probably won't remember...

Ingrid said...

Caffeine, never leave home without it.

Love the art, you are very talented. How subtle. It can also be seen as a representation of the emptiness of existence, or as a throwback to an earlier, less cluttered and consumer-oriented existence. Right? ;-)

Brian o Vretanos said...

Ingrid:

I couldn't have put it better myself!

The piece has of embodies many meanings and symbolisms simultaneiously, including that of the fullness of existence - so full that no individual thing can be discerned in the total whiteness of the light.

Bee said...

I bid one peso.

Jean Knee said...

Looks like a kid spilled paint in kindergarten to me


believe me, I've seen it many times. congrats Brian, your work is on par with a kindergartener

Bee said...

I disagree jean knee, I see tomato stains in the shape of a radish...?? What the heck!

Jean Knee said...

that's because you are stoned after licking LSD laced wallpaper in Willy Wonka's Chocolate factory


(heee hewww haaww, she said Willy)

Esmeralda said...

My niece(8yrs.old) has known the truth about Santa Claus all her life....My sister didn't want anyone else taking credit for her hardwork, effort and generosity. She felt that her child needed to know exactly who her gifts come from!!

Bee said...

MMMMMM LSD mmmmm
PURPLE!!!

Bee said...

Brian, it's 4-ish your time right now and I can't wait for you to wake up and see you have been tagged for a meme! You have to do it, it's the law.
Sincerely,
Bee

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

Did you really let children take home blank pictures when you were the Kindergarten Cop? That's evil...

Esmerelda:

That's honest.

Bee:

Sold! To the lady with the rare 1904 solid gold double-headed peso.

Anonymous said...

"Thankfully, she's not got that much more acquisitive - this year she wants the latest Aled Jones CD. (well someone has to buy it, keep the poor guy from starving)."

*****************************************

Just a little hint...could I earnestly put in the suggestion that if you're going to be the wise gift-giver of Aled Jones' latest CD, you do so asap, before it sells out? It's such a GORGEOUS album and well worth buying! Grab several in fact ...I'm sure you must have a number of friends and rellies who deserve the perfect music for their pressies this Christmas.
You may well find you buy one for yourself!

S....

Brian o Vretanos said...

S.....:

Thankyou for this advice. However, I have already heard his stuff ;-)

Both Helena, who sings in the school choir, and my ex's mum (another chorister) are AJ fans, but it's not my type of thing, I'm afraid. Helena was thrilled when her school got to sing with him at a one of his concerts.

Jean Knee said...

Uhmmmm Brian where's the post???? are you okay????

what's going on here???


Brian.....

Bee said...

Yeah! What she said!

Bee said...

I made another Bat cry...
The exact time was 9:28 AM Central Time.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

It's there now - a little late, as I had trouble with the one I was going to do.

Bee and Bats:

You're evil ;-)