Sunday, 16 December 2007

Wish List

I'm my own worst enemy. My laid back attitude means that I do everything at the last minute. Yesterday I realised that it's getting rather late for posting parcels across the Atlantic in time for Christmas, and I haven't yet told you what I want. So here's my 2007 Christmas List:

A Gift Voucher - good at any lawyers for a divorce. Alternatively, something of equivalent value, such as ownership of a gold mine.

A Light - like the one they use in "The Prisoner". This makes sure that you get a good night's sleep, so I can stop looking like I'm practising for a role in a George Romero film.

Einstein's Brain - so I can get my head round the Theory of Relativity.

A Food Maker - like the ones they have on "Star Trek". Who needs recipes, or cookers, or indeed kitchens?

A Force Field - that stops spiders getting into my flat.

So it's a fairly modest list of bits and pieces. Alternatively, I'll settle for a new jumper or some socks...

20 comments:

Bee said...

::sigh:: Well, I was going to get you a new "jumper" but unfortunately I don't know what that is... jumper cables??
Oh well, maybe next year!

Bee said...

If you did have a force field to prevent spiders, wouldn't they all be hanging out waiting to pounce on you as soon as you walked out of the force field. Something to dream about.

Jean Knee said...

is a jumper something like overalls? If they are I forbid you to wear one, ever

Jean Knee said...

the waffle maker 4000 is almost like no effort. Yesterday I made french toast, which came out perfectly delicious.

I still had to touch the bread coated with slimy eggs, ewww, but it was still pretty easy.


you must get one. they are cheap and you can probably pick one up second hand

Brian o Vretanos said...

Bee:

Never mind, they say it's the thought that counts. They're wrong, it's the value ;-)

A jumper is a woollen top, not overalls. Something you wear when it's cold.

Jean Knee:

Do you want me to have to give up coffee as well???

Brian o Vretanos said...

Bee:

Hopefully they'd be so afraid of the force field that they'd keep their distance, but you may have a point...

Jean Knee said...

Huh? I was talkin bout the waffle maker 4000, saying it is almost like having a star trek food maker thing.



never give up coffee willingly
and please describe it's lusciousness in full detail

Dan said...

i think while at home we're never more then 2 feet away from the nearest spider, they are behind walls and under floors and carpets.
Dan

Chris said...

So a Jumper is really a sweater? Or do you have sweaters too? I think sweaters should just be universally called sweaters because now the cute purple pin striped jumper I sent you...will just seem silly as you really wanted a sweater and not my version of a Jumper. I thought it was weird that you liked dresses.

Anyway, I have to go because now I'm freaked out by all the arachnid talk.

Jean Knee said...

are you gonna wear the jumper Chris sent you???

If you do, post a pic,,,...please

we won't laugh

Bee said...

Speak for yourself jean knee cuz I WILL laugh. Out Loud.

Jean Knee said...

If a peep laughs in cyber space can the recipient hear the laughter???? no
therefore say you won't laugh



BRIAN--- are you still out at the disco???

Bee said...

He is out at the disco in a purple jumper...

search party for Brian said...

we've searched all the pubs and jumper shops, no sign of him so far. Next we'll hit the grocers green bean aisles

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

Waffle Maker: It ceratinly sounds like a good substitute, though I don't want to end up off the coffee like you.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Dan,

I don't mind being that close to a spider as long as I don't know it's there.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Chris:

Yes, pullover = jumper. I didn't realise that Americans wouldn't know what it was. Your humour is poorer as a result:

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?

A: A woolly jumper.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee/Bee:

I'm more zombified than usual. I spent yesterday evening getting my mother's computer set up to use on the internet, and had a sleepless night last night. There'll be a post soon (well after the news).

Jean Knee said...

oh the horror! next time you are gone you better make up a story cuz that one sux


what a nice son you are to do that for your momma. My dad is struggling with his used computer and won't let us come help him.

Brian o Vretanos said...

Jean Knee:

Once your Christmas present arrives, I'll be able to say that I accidentally cooked my blog post in the waffle-maker.

Yes, I'm definitely a model son. My mother lives 10 minutes drive away, and I must go there, oh, at least twice a year. Not that she's exactly the doting mother type...